Can Fear and Trust Coexist?
I’ve always been a fearful person. Maybe it’s because my cousins and siblings are mostly on the more extreme side of adventurous, but I often felt like I was controlled and defined by fear throughout my life — which may be why my favorite book series when I was little was about a girl named Mandie and the adventures she went on. She lived a wild life and experienced crazy things, but was also fearful like I was. Mandie would pray when she was in trouble and quote her favorite verse, Psalm 56:3 —
"When I am afraid, I will put my trust in You."
So, of course, little Alicia — who only wanted to have a life like Mandie's — chose that verse for my favorite, too. When I re-read this chapter recently, I was suddenly thrown back to my childhood of fear and constantly being told that I was too afraid. I can’t even count the number of times I was told, “God says ‘Do not fear’ over 365 times – enough for every day of the year,” and therefore, I shouldn’t fear either! And don’t even get me started on all the verses that were quoted at me to support this statement. However, as a more mature and cognizant adult, I began to wonder if maybe we’ve interpreted this conversation all wrong.
I wonder if fear really is as simple as choosing not to, (which, in turn, makes me feel like God is belittling my feelings) or, if maybe we have misinterpreted and misunderstood what it means to “do not fear.”
Culturally
We live in a world that talks about hard things cognitively, and yet is simultaneously running harder and faster from feeling hard things than ever before.
We run from death. When someone dies, your work gives you three days of bereavement (as if three days is enough to mourn an entire lifetime).
We run from grief. When someone cries, our defense mechanisms go on overdrive, and it's all we can do to hold back cracking a joke to break the tension.
We run from tears. Even babies when they cry, what do we say? "Shhhh." As if we can't bear to even hear their cries of anguish.
We run from conflict. When someone says they need to talk to you and suddenly your schedule is full for the next week.
Are we afraid of grief? Are we afraid of death? Are we afraid of change?
Why are we so quick to change the subject, ignore the pain, shut down the feelings? And, is it really that easy? Is it even possible and/or healthy to shut it off?
Is God in all of his wisdom, omniscience, intention and with-us-ness oversimplifying our feelings and adding to this unhealthy habit of just don’t do it?
.... Unless that's not what he is saying at all.
Maybe we interpret it that way because that is the way we would mean it if we said it today. But, we have to remember that 1) we are not the author and 2) we are not the original audience.
So, what would that mean for the original audience when God says do not fear?
Biblically
Let’s take a look at some of these verses where God says do not fear:
"After this, the word of the Lord came to Abram in a vision: ‘Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your very great reward.’" (Gen. 15:1)
"God heard the boy crying, and the angel of God called to Hagar from heaven and said to her, ‘What is the matter, Hagar? Do not be afraid; God has heard the boy crying as he lies there.’" (Gen. 21:17)
"That night the Lord appeared to him and said, ‘I am the God of your father Abraham. Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bless you and will increase the number of your descendants for the sake of my servant Abraham.’" (Gen. 26:24)
"‘I am God, the God of your Father,’ he said. ‘Do not be afraid to go down to Egypt, for I will make you into a great nation there.’" (Gen. 46:3)
Just from the first book of the Bible we can see some themes: each time a call to have no fear is met with a reason — I am your shield, I have heard your cry, I am with you, etc.
Each time someone is told not to fear, that person is reminded of something about God.
It reminds me of the verses that say, “there is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear because fear involves punishment. The one who fears has not been perfected in love. We love because He first loved us.” (1 Jn. 4:18-19)
Is it a choice that we can make to not fear, or is it actually a thing that happens naturally when we see God for who he is?
For me personally
I believe that fear and trust can co-exist as long as God is included in the equation. We can live in trust because we rest in his love for us. Fear might not leave, but its role in the conversation and our lives has shifted.
I picture a room that is full of clutter (fear). We have to make some space, no matter how big or small, for our new roomie. As he makes himself at home in our lives, slowly but surely fear begins to realize it has overstayed its welcome. It doesn’t get to dictate our responses or our opinions or our actions anymore. Because of who God is, we don’t have to run away or hide from our feelings.
When David wrote Psalm 56, he was being pursued by people who wanted to kill him. He knew what he was afraid of, and he called it out and brought it before the Lord. Then he chose to believe what God had said to him was better. His fear might not have left him, but it certainly was lessened in the light of WHO God is.
He was able to say, “When I am afraid, I will put my trust in You” because he knew who the Lord was in his life. He says later in the verse 13, “For You have delivered my soul from death, indeed my feet from stumbling, so that I may walk before God in the light of the living.” Did you catch that word in past tense? “Delivered.” David was writing this while he was being hunted. But, he knew his life was held in the hands of the one who created him and so he could have this perspective.
Friend, I don’t know what it is that you are feeling right now. Maybe you’re like me, and it’s fear and anxiety. Maybe its grief. Or depression. There are so many things that can threaten your peace and your life – literally, emotionally, figuratively, etc. But, I know that the Lord is trustworthy. He is with you just as he was with Abraham, Hagar, Moses and David. With the Lord in the room, your fear or your feelings aren’t in control. Name them, bring them to Jesus, and feel the peace of God which surpasses all understanding and will guard your heart and mind in Christ Jesus (Phil. 4:7).
Xoxo!!
